A Letter To My Sister and All Mothers.
*The elder sister, that is Sen, not Ling, whom you guys know.
*Matthew is my sister's son aka my nephew.
Hello Big Sister!
I feel compelled to write you a letter because Matthew just called me and said that he couldn't sleep the whole night because of his upcoming exams. I prayed with him over the phone.
I love your family and I love you and so I feel I must speak out against the direction which you are all headed.
I know I am not qualified to give any parenting tips for obvious reasons. But as a sister in Christ, I want to tell you that God is. He loves you and your family more than anyone else and wants to free you from all your burdens.
"31 So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matthew 6:31-33)
You love Matthew and worry for his future. Does God not love him more than you? Will He abandon your child because he is not achieving school expectations? Will He not provide for his needs because he does not do well enough in school? God knows what he needs and He will provide them. The burden is not yours alone.
"28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28)
God is in control of all things - how well your son learns, how well he expresses, how well he does in school. Your friends who do not know God do not know this, and so they run around anxiously, looking for answers at the wrong places - tuition centres, assessment books, motivational seminars etc. You don't have to follow their lead. Commit everything that is out of your control to God and rest in Him. Then you can have peace and sit back and watch Him work in your family. I assure you that no tuition centre can bring such peace. They only add to your burden and anxiety.
God is the best person to go for parenting tips. Have you asked Him how He wants you to bring up your children? Just as He loves your children, He loves you. Will He not provide you the strength and wisdom to lead the family if you ask Him? He will gladly use you to do great things in the lives of your husband and children.
Lastly, "Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes?" (Matthew 6:25b) Are Matthew's results the most important thing that determines his life? Is your children's success the most important ting that determines yours?
This is a prophecy yet to be fulfilled in the Bible -
" 1 See, the LORD is going to lay waste the earth
and devastate it;
he will ruin its face
and scatter its inhabitants—
2 it will be the same
for priest as for people,
for the master as for his servant,
for the mistress as for her servant,
for seller as for buyer,
for borrower as for lender,
for debtor as for creditor.
3 The earth will be completely laid waste
and totally plundered.
The LORD has spoken this word." (Isaiah 24:1-3)
Smart or not, successful or not, we must all face and be accountable to God at the end of time. Is your family's faith not more important than worldly success? Ask God what He wants for your life and your family's. He will answer you with love.
I have been praying unceasingly for your family. Join me in prayer! God is good and He listens.
Lots of love,
Your Little Sis.
---
To all other mummies out there:
I don't mean to offend anyone with my letter. I do not want to trivialize the stress of being a Singaporean mother, whose children has to compete hard in the flawed education system. I acknowledge the difficulties and pains of motherhood. I long for the joy of it as well. It is a noble and beautiful task. And for that, I pray that this letter would bring you to God, for He is love and the only source of peace. May He bless you and your family abundantly.
Love,
Shu.
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